Hillary's path to power required Faustian bargain
From mapping a path to power to laudable notions of holding the family together, "Why They Stay" examine the uniquely challenging Faustian bargains that political wives grapple with.
Hillary Clinton couldn’t have known in 1998 how her husband’s high-profile philandering would play out. Would he be rehabilitated in the public eye? She couldn’t be sure, but she took the gamble. Had she left the marriage, today she might be the spurned wife of a retired politician instead of on the precipice to lead the free world.
Looking back on the path chosen by the nine political wives profiled in "Why They Stay: Sex Scandals, Deals, and Hidden Agendas of Nine Political Wives," we have the evidence to see a pattern—as old as the dynastic maneuverings of England’s medieval queens. The women married to the “royalty” of our times—politicians—make similar cold calculations in order to hold onto their “thrones” and their family’s history-making potential.
After covering politicians for decades as a reporter and columnist, I switched my gaze to the women behind the cheating men. Drawing from multiple sources that span the Roosevelts’ marriage to the more recent scandal involving Hillary Clinton’s closest aide Huma Abedin (wife of “sexter,” Anthony Weiner), "Why They Stay" argues that when it comes to the “power behind the throne,” women in the limelight weigh the risks and rewards. They remain loyal to their men, because of complex, often unconscious forces.
From mapping a path to power to laudable notions of holding the family together, I examine the uniquely challenging Faustian bargains that political wives grapple with, even as the public spotlight illuminates their every move.
Publishing in March 2017, Why They Stay explores the possible reasoning and motivation behind why political wives stay with their husbands after the husbands cheat. For updates on the book launch, sign up at whytheystaybook.com.
The political limelight bends couples
Real-life political couples have learned to perform for the media and, at the same time, to distrust media reports. They turn intensely inward toward each other and a few close advisers for counsel. They lose touch with what's considered normal in marriage.
Our public conversation about politically married women who remain in the marriage after infidelity has remained frozen in place. When the Monica Lewinsky scandal broke, we asked, "Why does Hillary stay with Bill?" And we are still asking essentially the same question. When Anthony Weiner's sexting came to light, we wanted to know what kept Huma in the marriage.
It would take a lot for me to leave my marriage, which I love, but the repeated public humiliations these wives have suffered would have been enough to break me.
So, I wrote a 260-something-page book called "Why They Stay: The Sex Scandals, the Deals and the Hidden Agendas of Nine Political Wives." I concluded that the spotlight changes how these couples react to infidelity. I'm sure you've heard references to politicians living in a bubble or an echo chamber. I feel that applies to their marriages. We can't judge them by normal standards.
For one, they've often lost touch with normal. These couples have learned to perform for the media and, at the same time, to distrust media reports, so that they turn inward toward each other and a few close advisers for counsel. Also, couples in public life fend off repeated political attacks, and the furor over an infidelity can elicit the same defensive crouch. The women who stay in these marriages are often described in the media as loyal, selfless, "a rock" -- which again distorts what's going on. The temptation to buy into that role, and inflate one's already powerful sense of patriotic purpose, must be enormous.
Publishing in March 2017, Why They Stay explores the possible reasoning and motivation behind why political wives stay with their husbands after the husbands cheat. For updates on the book launch, sign up at whytheystaybook.com.